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Friends

At 31 years old, I feel like I am becoming a grumpy old man because my friend list continues to diminish. I asked my wife what she thought, she said, “you’re becoming a better friend.” She said think about all the “close friends” you have had in the past and now think about the ones you have stuck with or have stuck with you.
I thought about it and made of lists of things I loathe and things I appreciate. Here are the 6 ways to be a better friend;
1.     

  Know who you are. I used to try to get in different friend groups, only to realize I did not like them and ultimately found myself becoming someone that was not me. I want to grow each day and be better for those around me, there is no need to be someone I am not.
2.        Stay true.  Be honest, it is amazing the respect people will give you when you just be true. There is nothing better than listening to a friend knowing what they are saying is real and not embellishing or flat out lying.
3.       Do not try to keep up with the Jones’. For years, we would try to keep up with those who are a little better off than us, all the while going broke. We realized if our friends did not understand we had to stay in or not do this or that, and then it was time to move on.
4.       Have a conversation, not a sales pitch. I have lost lots of friends through the years because I cannot stand when people try to persuade me one way or another. From politics to pyramid schemes, you have your beliefs, I have mine. If I cannot have a conversation without it being a two way street then there is no conversation.
5.       Inadvertent push to be better. Being a part of the “inner circle” of friends we inadvertently make each other better. It is not something we talk about, it just happens by trying to be good people.

6.       Listen. Most importantly and we have all heard this one but just listen. So often I would listen, with the intent to give back advice. Some of us just want you to listen, not give advice, not compare it to an experience you have had, just listen. 

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